POV

FULL EPISODE

To The Future, with Love

Meet 19-year-old Hunter “Pixel” Jimenez, a nonbinary trans boy caught between the expectations of his Guatemalan immigrant family and his dreams of living happily ever after.

AIRED: November 22, 2021 | 0:06:58
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TRANSCRIPT

[gentle music]

[pencil scratching on paper]

[eraser rubbing on paper]

[upbeat music]

Hello, my name is Hunter Pixel Jimenez.

I'm 19 years old

and it's my last year of being a teenager.

The number one thing on my mind is: What now?

[dogs barking]

Living in Los Angeles, there's always so much to do.

You can go left and you're in Downtown.

You can go right and you're in Hollywood.

[vendors calling]

I live in Koreatown.

I live with my stepdad, my mom, and my sister.

We live in a one bedroom apartment.

It's very small,

but right now I'm very happy where I am,

living with my family and being very close to them.

[vehicle engine humming]

My family is from Guatemala.

When they came to the USA,

my family really wanted to fit in.

[whistling]

Man: Hola.

I think everyone wants to fit in.

[bell ringing]

I definitely want to fit in, despite my crazy identity.

[wind blowing]

Right now, I identify as a non-binary trans man.

I like the idea of people thinking

that I'm an adorable boy.

[upbeat music]

I really like feminine colors, clothing styles,

pastel blues, pastel greens,

anything that in the binary world would be considered girly.

Being at home, it's very complicated.

My family knows about my identity,

but it's still an elephant in the room.

[chattering]

Even after all these years,

they still ask me, "Are you sure?

Are you sure that you're a boy,

because you still like boys?"

[gentle music]

My boyfriend is Damienne.

He lives in Arkansas.

He's also trans.

Damienne is my galaxy prince.

[hooves clopping]

He is the light that shone in my darkness,

which is weird, because if you know him, he's very punk.

[cymbal]

We text each other, talk on the phone every day.

[beeping]

In a perfect world,

I would love to live in a small apartment with him

and just be happy and gay.

But it's not the reality.

[music stops]

[gentle music]

Despite being together for three years,

we've never met in person

because of our financial circumstances.

[coin clinking]

He lives in a place where it's really hard to get a job

as a trans person.

It seems like every year we have plans,

but something always comes up where that money has to go

to something else.

[glass shattering]

I know if I lived a more privileged life,

things would be different.

I would be in university, but right now, it's all on me.

I kind of have to make sure everything's gonna be okay.

I go to work, help pay the bills as much as I can,

but I know that if I let myself have nice things

and I'm not taking care of my financial responsibilities,

then none of the bills are gonna get paid

and we're gonna be homeless.

[thunder clapping]

Some part of me wishes I can be a kid again.

I feel like I grew up too fast.

[birds chirping]

But I feel very ready.

[family bidding goodbye]

I'm in a job that I love.

I met people that have really changed me.

I'm with the love of my life.

And I got stronger to hold everything together.

There will be a day where I'm not gonna be living

with my parents or my sister anymore.

[vendors calling]

And I'll be ready.

Life is so short.

Just follow your stupid fucking dreams.

[gentle electronic music]

[gentle electronic music continues]

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